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Using the Enneagram for Forgiveness: A Path to Healing and Growth

identity| Enneagram
September 11, 2024•3 min read
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UNDERSTANDING THE ENNEAGRAM AND FORGIVENESS

What is the Enneagram?

The Enneagram is a personality typing system that identifies nine distinct types of people, each with its own core motivations, fears, and behaviors. It serves as a tool for self-discovery and personal growth, helping individuals understand themselves and others on a deeper level.

The Role of the Enneagram in Forgiveness

The Enneagram can facilitate forgiveness by promoting self-awareness and empathy. Each Enneagram type has its own approach to dealing with hurt and resentment. Understanding these patterns can help you address the barriers to forgiveness and find a path toward healing and compassion.

FORGIVENESS FOR EACH ENNEAGRAM TYPE

Type 1: The Reformer

  • Tips: Focus on self-compassion and accepting imperfections. Recognize that everyone, including yourself, makes mistakes. Practice letting go of the need for things to be perfect and allow yourself to forgive others and yourself for being human.

Type 2: The Helper

  • Tips: Prioritize your own needs and boundaries. Understand that forgiveness doesn’t mean neglecting your well-being. Practice self-love and recognize that forgiving others is part of taking care of yourself.

Type 3: The Achiever

  • Tips: Embrace authenticity and vulnerability. Allow yourself to feel and express emotions without fear of appearing weak. Forgiveness involves acknowledging the hurt and moving past it to achieve genuine personal growth.

Type 4: The Individualist

  • Tips: Focus on self-acceptance and finding beauty in imperfection. Understand that everyone experiences hurt and betrayal. Practice seeing the humanity in others and yourself, which can foster a forgiving attitude.

Type 5: The Investigator

  • Tips: Balance intellectual understanding with emotional engagement. Recognize that forgiveness is not just a mental exercise but also an emotional journey. Allow yourself to connect with your feelings and express them.

Type 6: The Loyalist

  • Tips: Cultivate trust in yourself and others. Understand that forgiveness involves letting go of fears and anxieties about betrayal. Practice seeing the good in people and situations, which can help build trust and forgiveness.

Type 7: The Enthusiast

  • Tips: Embrace stillness and reflection. Allow yourself to process and acknowledge pain instead of avoiding it. Forgiveness requires facing the hurt and understanding its impact, which leads to genuine emotional healing.

Type 8: The Challenger

  • Tips: Practice vulnerability and empathy. Understand that forgiveness involves letting down your guard and connecting with others on a deeper emotional level. Allow yourself to feel and express softer emotions.

Type 9: The Peacemaker

  • Tips: Assert your needs and express your feelings. Recognize that avoiding conflict does not lead to true peace. Forgiveness involves addressing the hurt and seeking resolution, which can bring genuine harmony.

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PRACTICAL STEPS FOR USING THE ENNEAGRAM TO FORGIVE

Self-Reflection and Awareness

Begin by identifying your Enneagram type and reflecting on its characteristics. Journaling can be a powerful tool for exploring your thoughts and feelings about forgiveness. Regular self-reflection helps you understand your patterns and triggers, fostering greater self-awareness.

Empathy and Understanding

Use the insights from the Enneagram to cultivate empathy for yourself and others. Recognize that everyone has unique struggles and motivations. Understanding these differences can help you approach forgiveness with compassion and openness.

Releasing Resentment and Embracing Compassion

Practice letting go of resentment and embracing compassion. This involves acknowledging the hurt, understanding its impact, and choosing to release it. Forgiveness is a process that takes time, so be patient with yourself and others as you navigate this journey.

RESOURCES FOR FURTHER EXPLORATION

There are many resources available to support you on your deconstruction journey. Consider exploring books on religious deconstruction, joining support groups, or attending workshops focused on spiritual growth. Join me over on my channel on YouTube, Beyond The Pew. These resources can provide valuable tools and perspectives as you navigate your path.

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Stephanie Hicks is a dedicated Spiritual Care Coach specializing in helping women of faith who have been hurt by their church community. With a focus on deconstructing religion while maintaining faith, Stephanie integrates the Enneagram to help clients find alignment between their authentic selves and who God created them to be. Her approach centers on the pillars of Awareness, Acceptance, and Alignment, guiding women to heal from past hurts, embrace their unique identities, and create fulfilling, purpose-driven lives. Outside of her coaching business, Stephanie is dreaming of a micro-farm, a roller skating aficionado, and a passionate homebody living in Murfreesboro, TN, with her husband, kids, dog, cat, and chickens.

Stephanie Hicks

Stephanie Hicks is a dedicated Spiritual Care Coach specializing in helping women of faith who have been hurt by their church community. With a focus on deconstructing religion while maintaining faith, Stephanie integrates the Enneagram to help clients find alignment between their authentic selves and who God created them to be. Her approach centers on the pillars of Awareness, Acceptance, and Alignment, guiding women to heal from past hurts, embrace their unique identities, and create fulfilling, purpose-driven lives. Outside of her coaching business, Stephanie is dreaming of a micro-farm, a roller skating aficionado, and a passionate homebody living in Murfreesboro, TN, with her husband, kids, dog, cat, and chickens.

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